Wednesday, October 28, 2009

The Top 10 Qualities In Single Men That Drive Women Crazy (According to Women)


Every man wants to know what women want, and here it is in a nutshell—the top 10 qualities that will turn almost any woman on in a heartbeat:

1.Confidence: Women don’t like wimps and wusses. Even those who want to baby you, don’t want you to actually be a baby. A woman needs to know that the man she’s with is self-aware and self-assured. That he knows who he is and what he’s about, and more, that he’s perfectly happy with that.

That’s why it’s the arrogant and cocky guys who get all the girls. Because confidence is cool. And cool is hot!


2.Chivalry – It’s not dead, no matter how much she claims otherwise. It’s not dead and it’ll never die. So by all means, be cool, boy—but also be a gentleman. It’s a tightrope, I know. But you’re playing with the big boys now. So man up and get on that highwire before she cuts the cord.

3.Sense of Humor: Make ‘em laugh, make ‘em laugh, make ‘em laugh. Life is hard, dating is harder. Which is why—whether your wit is sharp and edgy or dry and droll or straight-up goofy—if you can break up the drudgery, frustration, and disappointment of her day with a good, hearty giggle, snicker, chuckle, or guffaw, you’ll have her coming back for more again and again, like a junkie for her fix. Remember guys, to a woman, a little bit of funny covers up a lot of ugly.

4.Spontaneity – Besides being hard, life is also extremely boring most of the time. One day bleeds into another and pretty soon you can’t tell one from the next. That’s why most women crave a little adventure and excitement in their lives—or a lot of it. And guess what, guys? They’re counting on you to be the one to deliver it. Fair? Maybe not. But it’s a fact of life. It’s up to you to come up with ever-new ways to keep her life fresh and exciting. That doesn’t necessarily mean you have to whisk her away to an exotic vacation spot (though that certainly doesn’t hurt). You can do it just as easily with a rose on her desk when she shows up at work, or a surprise date on her lunch break. Be creative. Be spontaneous. And whatever you do, do not be boring or predictable.

5.Complimentary: How hard is it to find one new thing about her each day to tell her that you like. That’s all it takes. You don’t have to heap on the flattery to win her heart. In fact it’s better if you spread it out slowly over time. Just try not to repeat yourself too much, or she may stop believing you.

6.The Ability to Listen: It’s no secret that women love to talk. But despite all evidence to the contrary, they’re not just talking to hear themselves speak. They really are talking to you. And they want to know that you hear them. Even if you’re not really interested in what she’s saying, can you at least pretend to be? A few well-placed nods and validating Uh-huh’s can go a long way at times like this. And an appropriate follow-up question can be your greatest ally, because it shows her that you’re really paying attention. But the number one best way to let a woman know you’re listening to her is to make eye contact. Because it’s hard to tune out what anyone is saying when you’re staring straight into their eyes (or so she thinks).

7.Sensuality: Women are body conscious enough for the both of you. So you don’t need to be at all okay? Part of being sure of yourself is being comfortable in your body, which for one thing means comfortable with touch. I’m not talking about groping her here. Sensuality is not the same as horniness, sorry. Nor is seduction the same as coming on to her. No, what I’m talking about here are subtly seductive acts like gently laying your hand atop hers as you’re sitting together, or placing your arm around her shoulders as you’re walking down the street. And to revisit an earlier point—making eye contact is more than just to show her you’re listening. It’s also a highly erotic act. Human being seek pleasure, period. And women want to feel that that’s exactly what the sight of her brings to you.

8.Security: While a woman of today doesn’t quite want a man to take care of her, she does want to know that he can if he has to. And yes, this is partly about money, but not completely. Women want to feel safe with the man they’re with. And while that includes financial security, it also includes emotional security. She wants to know that you’ll protect her tender heart like a priceless jewel. That you’re not going to leave her out in the cold just because she’s pissed you off. And more, that you’re not going to leave her out in the cold because you don’t have the capacity to keep her safe and warm if you wanted to. To do this, you need to show her first and foremost that you can take care of yourself. That’s the only way she can start to trust that you’ll be able to take care of her too. Fortunately, most women, once this trust is established, will gladly return the favor.

9.Fashion Sense: Most men have the fashion sense of a Mr. Potatohead. But most men also have a platonic female friend or two (or at least a sister) who’ll be happy to give him some fashion tips—maybe even a total makeover if you ask really nicely. Take one of them clothes shopping with you if you must. Just don’t underestimate the power of a well-dressed man to make a woman swoon. That means throw out any clothes with holes, pulls, tears, etc. And if you just can’t bear to part with that favorite shirt, make it a workshirt (and that’s housework and yardwork, guys, not what you wear to your day job—jeez!) And by the way, don’t forget about the shoes! There’s a reason why most women have got a closetful of footwear. Because they know that the wrong shoes can ruin an otherwise perfectly smashing outfit.

10.Good Hygiene: You thought I wasn’t going to note down any physical traits here, didn’t you? Well listen up, all you lazy pigs! It doesn’t matter to her if you look like Brad Pitt or Gilbert Gottfried. As any rerun of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” will show you, if there’s one thing a woman can’t stand it’s bad teeth, bad hair, and bad skin (okay, that’s 3 things, but still…). A woman will forgive a lot in a man, but what she won’t put up with for even a second is poor hygiene. So for heaven’s sake (not to mention the sake of your love life) brush your teeth, comb your hair, wash your face, and pluck out those nose- and ear-hairs before you let her see you, would ya? Trust me, by doing so you’ll instantly set yourself apart from 95% of the single guys out there. And believe you me, she will notice.

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