What do you do after sex? A recent study has shown that the best bonding takes place afterwards, not before, but most couples don’t take advantage of this, and instead watch TV, or go for a shower. Leading sexologists have announced that couples should make use of the hormone influx after orgasms, but what exactly should we be doing? Here are my top eight ways to feel closer after sex…
1. Enjoy Some Wine
Most people are thirsty after sex, but instead of getting a beer, open a bottle of wine. The antioxidants will help you to relax, and the sensual, sexy vibe will continue. If you want to get even closer, try sharing a glass, and feeding each other strawberries as a healthy and sexy snack.
2. Unplug Everything
Make sure your phone is off, or on silent, and keep the TV off. Facebook isn’t important right now, and there is nothing that will kill the mood (or annoy your partner) more than an unimportant text which makes you laugh and breaks the atmosphere.
A few strategically placed candles will give your room a really sensual look, but they can also do much more then that. By picking your candles carefully, you can really set a mood. I love Cowshed candles, which come in a mix of scents, from ‘horny’ to ‘relaxing’ and even ‘moody’. And, they all smell divine.
Have you ever given your partner a neck massage after sex? Not only is it immensely relaxing, and the physical contact will cause your body to continue to release oxytocin and prolactin, which will make you feel close and bonded. I love this. It’s the best secret sex tip ever!
5. Take Your Time
Sometimes, you’ll have somewhere else to be, and have to leave. Make sure that occasionally, you can go to bed and have a few hours to enjoy each other, without the need to get up and rush out. Having time to spend together in a close and intimate environment is great for bonding, and for making sure that both partners feel valued. A friend of mine tried this trick with her boyfriend, who she was convinced only wanted her for sex. After spending a few days enjoying each other without the usual time pressures, they were both feeling much more secure, and much happier too!
6. Don’t Roll Over
Unless it’s the middle of the night, don’t roll over once you’re done. A recent study has shown that both men and women dislike this, and give the act too much of a ‘chore’ feeling. Instead, cuddle together in a spoons position, or if you don’t find that comfortable, try intertwining legs, or holding hands. Keep some physical contact! I love cuddling up on my boyfriends chest, it’s my favorite place to sleep.
7. Pick Your Playlist
This one can be used straight away or later, as a reminder. Make a playlist of songs that remind you of each other. This doesn’t necessarily have to be the typical romance songs, or your wedding songs, think more along the line of sexy songs and make a special playlist. Then, play it afterwards, or at random points. Whenever you hear them, you’ll be reminded of that intimacy, and it really will make you feel closer!
8. Spice Things Up
You have to be careful with this one, and check that you aren’t breaking laws or likely to get caught. The next time you are somewhere risqué, and the feeling takes you, find somewhere to have sex. The feeling of naughtiness will make the sex amazing, and also make you feel much closer afterwards! After all, he’ll be your partner in crime.
I’ve had a few friends with relationship difficulties recently, and sex is always an issue. It doesn’t necessarily mean there is something wrong, though, so try using sex as a way to get your relationship back on track. Obviously it can’t solve all problems, but the closeness afterwards is invaluable in a relationship. Do you have a tip on feeling closer after sex? Please share it with me!