9 Rules For Bringing Men Home …

So you’ve found a man and invited him home, but how do you make sure everything goes smoothly once you are on your way? Bringing men home can be a battlefield but with these ten rules, you’ll look smart, sexy and dignified, rather than risk looking (and feeling!) like a naughty teenager…

1. Warning

If you share your house, text your house mate when you’ve asked him and warn her that you are bringing a man home. That way, she can make sure she is decent, the flat is tidy and she won’t be scared if she sees a strange man in the bathroom at midnight…

2. Be Prepared

Make sure you have some sort of contraceptive ready! There is nothing more embarrassing than having to ask a flatmate, or make a shameful run to the garage to grab some. So ensure that you are prepared in advance and you’ll be ready for any situation!

3. Clear the Room

There isn’t really anything more embarrassing than an awkward coffee with your flatmates when you’d rather be in private, so ask them to disappear for ten minutes when you arrive. They can have run of the house when you and him are safe behind closed doors!

4. Room Check

Make sure your room is fit for company before you let him in. That means hiding teddies, underwear, pictures of ex boyfriends. Seeing someone’s dirty granny pants and framed photos of an ex boyfriend isn’t exactly arousing!

5. Lights Out

He came home with you, so he thinks you are gorgeous and wants to enjoy your company. So don’t turn the lights out, and don’t get undressed in the dark. Be confident, and enjoy yourself!

6. But Be Careful…

That said, men get intimidated too. Porn star poses naked on the bed with your sex toys probably isn’t going to have the desired effect on a first date and will probably send him running from your house.


7. Toothbrush

Don’t offer him your spare toothbrush… you’ll give him the impression you are always bringing men home. And unless you are already serious, don’t offer yours, either. He’ll be fine with his finger and some Colgate, or just mouthwashing.


8. Morning Kisses

In the movies it always looks cute, romantic and sexy all in one, but in real life, morning kisses will just result in a shocking mix of disgusting morning breath! Especially if he didn’t brush his teeth. Leave the kissing for after the freshen up.

9. Fry Up

You’ll show yourself off as perfect girlfriend material if you make him a fry up in the morning, and while you are at it, he can freshen up and you can consider if the night was worth it. Win win!

Following these rules has really helped my friends avoid embarrassing situations, and even helped one turn her crush into a serious relationship. I must admit though, I will miss hearing her hilarious stories about taking men home. Have you got a rule for bringing men home? Please share it with me!